It seems a bit like death and taxes – a certainty of this human experience. Associated with work for many people but it can flare in any area of life in which we feel we do not have the control we want.

It’s a conundrum, how to deal with it. On the one hand, part of the very reason we feel stress is due to our perception that we ‘should’ be able to control the thing that brings stress… work, our children, politics, economics….! On the other hand, once we know we’re stressed, we have a desire to control the stress itself. (There’s that word ‘control’ again 🙂

Some stress is a good thing; we need some stress in our lives in order to be stretched, to grow, to keep agile and improve the ability to adapt. The trouble is, prolonged high stress can escalate into anxiety, depression and other, sometimes severe emotional or physical health problems.

The sensation of panic, unable to get enough oxygen, a racing heart, feeling overwhelmed with tasks, deadlines, responsibilities. Perhaps feeling emotionally unsettled, mentally paralyzed to the point of inertia, unable to sleep, relax or enjoy life. Whatever the impetus, the symptoms are similar for many of us.

Some people find it helpful to remember that at its most basic, stress is a safety mechanism. Your senses constantly take in information and your brain, as the master computer of your body-mind, tries to make sense of all of it and elicits a stress response when deemed necessary. Unfortunately, many of us modern humans are so consistently in a state of stress that we rarely, if ever, come out of it. If so, your sympathetic nervous system is in over-drive.

The sympathetic nervous system (SNS) is in charge of your ‘fight / flight’ response – these are the ‘keep you safe’ reactions that prevent being struck by a car while crossing a busy street, for example. Very useful in small doses, but elevated and prolonged activity of the SNS changes the brain’s neural pathways and the whole process becomes a feedback loop. Like driving a car through deep snow, neural messages get caught in the ruts – the path of least resistance. The brain becomes wired to follow the wiring pattern most often followed.

However there is good news. You might have heard of neuroplasticity – the remarkable ability of the brain and the nervous system to change how it responds to stimuli. In other words, we can re-wire the brain — and therefore minimize the negative impact of sustained stressful circumstances.

When stress becomes the baseline

There is, though, an important distinction that shapes how we find relief.

Acute stress responds well to conscious tools like breath practices. It arises in response to a specific situation — a difficult conversation, a looming deadline, an unexpected disruption — and ideally, the nervous system can return to a state of relative ease once the moment passes. This is stress physiology rising and dissipating as it was designed to do.

Chronic stress is something different. When activation becomes sustained over months or years, the nervous system loses its capacity to return to baseline. The body starts to see the activated state as the new normal — an underlying tension that becomes so familiar it doesn’t register as stress at all. “This is just the way I am” is something I hear often in sessions.

Due to the innate relationship between nervous system state and breath pattern, your breath is a tool that can genuinely support the nervous system to shift state. Practiced regularly, they build neural pathways that make regulation more accessible over time. Having said that, in some cases, breath alone may not be enough to reach it.

This is where other somatic practices become relevant — not as a replacement for breath, but as an approach to soften the deeper patterning. Approaches such as Somatic Experiencing® work directly with the body’s held stress via nervous system response by gently tracking sensation, noticing where the system braces or withdraws, and supporting it toward a more settled baseline — not by pushing through, but by meeting what is there at its own pace.

For in-the-moment regulation — and for building the nervous system’s capacity for flexibility over time — the following three practices are an approachable place to begin.

In honing the simple, you can change the state of your nervous system simply by changing your breath. In fact, I encourage you to try it now. For the next couple of minutes bring your complete attention to your breath. Simply notice yourself breathing in and out, relaxed and easy…. observe without any attempt to modify your breathing.

After a couple of minutes, notice how you feel. In this moment, you were perhaps already feeling somewhat relaxed and by paying attention to your breath, maybe you brought an even deeper sense of calm to your nervous system. In more challenging situations we need more advanced practices, and like any skill, we practice, practice, practice before the big game. With breath, it’s helpful to practice breath patterns that bring more calm while we’re relatively relaxed so that when the pressure is on, the wiring is already in place. The brain and the nervous system know what to do; they follow the new wiring.

Three practices to re-set your nervous system

Practice these simple breath patterns as often as you can when you’re feeling calm, so that when the pressure is on, they can help you manage stress.

Please begin any of these with 3-5 minutes of simply observing your breath as above, and come into a calm, resourced and grounded state of being.

Download the 3-practice-guide

At any moment your breath is right here for you; all you need to do is notice and if you can focus a wee bit more, you can change how you feel, simply by using your breath.

When you want to go deeper

If stress feels less like something that comes and goes and more like something you live inside of, it may be worth exploring whether a body-centred approach could offer a deeper layer of support.

Two possibilities are my workspaces — Somatic Experiencing® and Breath Therapy — in person in Calgary, Alberta and online via Zoom. If you’re curious about whether this kind of work might be right for you, I offer a free 20-minute consultation. No pressure — just a conversation to see if it’s a good fit.