The Misleading Pull of Memory

dawn zentner

May 10, 2021

I was reminded. One of my mentor/coaches was speaking the other day about the energy present at the moment – it being one containing the pull of memory. Memories, past experiences, dragging us in and ‘back’ . I have personally been sensing just that, very much pulled into the past; past experiences, past relationships and their energy, past illusions.

What struck me, is that we are all quite simply and unequivocally on the precise journey we are on and as much as our memories may push or pull us, no single event (or choice) alters the journey we are on. Whether we choose this job or that one, this city or the other, the woman or the man to love and partner with, it makes no difference to the inner journey each of us must navigate (which is, in my mind, the big journey). By this reckoning, each of us would be exactly here with this precise theme of challenge in this moment whether regardless of which job, city, partner….

We get distracted by the details, and this is one of the reasons memory can trap us… would this theme I’m in be easier if I had chosen option A instead of B / the red pill vs the blue one… No. The theme is the thing. So whether every corner, choice, detour is a challenge, a burden or a joy is simply, and most profoundly inconsequential because the journey is within you. The theme is your journey. All the rest of it is distraction – a place for us to explain or lay blame (as in I’m this way because…). (Yes, experiences contributed of course.). And yet, is there any doubt of the theme you’re to work on in this lifetime? If we really dial in to what the recurring thing is, we always know.

I’ve often felt that regret is a waste of my time, and I believe I’ve just had a glimpse as to why. Even if I had made all the other choices in the past; even if I were ‘perfectly adjusted’ and ‘highly evolved’ ? I would still be on this journey, with this theme. I would still be right where I am.

So, instead of being pulled by what was, what might have been, what if… I’m choosing to be in “ok, here I am. Let’s do something great with it.”

The Journal

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